2 weeekss baby!!!!!!!!!! 2 weeeksss!!!!!!!!!!!! heck yeahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dayyyymmmm.. i am so excittteddd.. wooohhoooo!!

OK... I haven't done ANYTHING yet.. what's wrong with me??? Well, I actually I finished my website today.. There's one accomplishment.. But that doesn't concern my school stuff!!! I need to finish my school stuff!!! waaahhhh.. I guess I need to get out of this blog to do it huh?

Did anyone wonder why we always cram things up when the end is near?? Say for example, your doing school projects that was assigned to you a month ago and your doing it during the last two weeks of school.. AND it's due on the first day of the last week of school (did anybody get what i mean by this?? don't worry I tend to confuse myself sometimes.. so bear with moi.. ) Anyway, yes, I admit my shameful acts of laziness and my ever wonderful slacker mode. I have a paper for chemistry that's due a week from now, a Chemistry test on Thursday, finals week a week from Wednesday. Boy oh BOY!!! am i gonna have fun or what??? oh and yeah.. I haven't even finished my Math hw that's gonna be due this coming Wednesday.. my goodness, whatever happened to the "highschool me", I guess this is what happens when not everything is spooned fed upon you.. SO, any advice for me?? constructive criticisms and suggestions are highly accepted for comments people, so you need not to worry about me finding you... CIAO!

i Refuse to..

here's another one..


I REFUSE TO WAIT FOR YOU ANY LONGER. There was a
time in my life when I would have saved myself
for you alone. In my heart no one else would do.
I belonged to no one else but you. That isn’t me
anymore. My heart finally caught up with my brain
and I finally saw that all of it was just nothing
but fantasies. Dreams that only I wanted. There
was no hope left for us. As each day passed, it
became clearer to me that it was never meant to
be. We were never meant to be.

I REFUSE TO LIVE IN THE PAST. What we shared
lives in the past, it doesn’t control me any
longer. Don’t get me wrong, I will forever
treasure it but I won’t let it hold me back. I
won’t let it ruin who I was and who I am now. For
a time, I almost forgot who I was without you.
I’ll never let that happen again. I won’t ever
lose myself again.

I REFUSE TO FIGHT ANYMORE. For several months
now, I’ve been fighting. I’ve been fighting for
our friendship and for us. However, no matter
what I do, I seem to be losing. Whenever I feel
as if I’m going to buckle down because of the
pressure, the thought that somehow maybe you are
fighting for us too kept me going. But months
have passed, I haven’t heard from you. Somehow I
finally realized that I was the only one fighting
for us. I was doing everything I could possibly
can for someone who was and never will be mine.

I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THAT YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME.
Somehow, someway, I know that I have a place in
your heart. You may not have been able to love me
the way I wanted you to love me but I know that
even for just a second, you really did love me.

I REFUSE TO LOSE HOPE. It may not be you. It may
take me forever to find him, but I will. Tears
have been streaming down my cheeks for too long
but not anymore. I have learned so many things
from all this. Things that I felt should have
been taught to me some other less painful way but
somehow I don’t regret it. It made me stronger.
It made me look inside myself and really see who
I really am and not who I thought I was. Hope
kept me going. The hope for better things to
come, the same hope that one day I will finally
be over you.

This was posted in my Friendster bulletin.. thought it was interesting.. so read on..

The Dance Of Life

There were two hearts who met in a dance. That
moment was magical, there was a sweet song
playing, there was harmony. And soon love in the
air. They fell in love and they started building
castles in their dreams. And promised forever
with all certainty.

But somewhere in the midst of the fun, they got
lost in the dance. Something went wrong, but they
can never do anything. They were just drifting
away, their fortress falling apart. There were so
many questions but no one had an answer. Then the
music stopped, then there was silence.

When we truly love someone we give our best and
let that person see the pureness of our
intentions. But sometimes that person makes us
cry and hurts us for the wrong reasons. That
someone must have loved us but he has not loved
us enough to make him stand for what he truly
felt.

Now, we are faced with the seemingly impossible
task of forgetting. We have burdened ourselves
long enough. But we still can’t get out from this
emotional trap. Let us remember that the more we
try to forget someone we love the more painful
letting go will become.

Sometimes we never have to take that person out
in our hearts at all, for he will always be there
no matter how hard we try to drive him away. It
isn’t his presence that made this difficult but
it is our stubbornness to accept our destiny that
aligns forgetting is next to impossible.

We keep a cold face but deep in our hearts there
still that lingering hope for a reconciliation.
Somehow, we still believe that we can rekindle
small embers and relight the fire that once
burned in our hearts. This thought gives us hope
but it also breeds the seeds of loneliness and
despair.

The only way to forget is to accept and the only
way to move on is to look ahead and let the
footprints of the past be blown by the wind of
time. Only then can our hearts find a partner in
the dance of life and hopefully never get lost
again...

tapos na website ko!!! isang page na lang tapos, tapos na ko!!! yehey!!!! i'm so proud of myself!! ehheheehhehe.. yun lang.. ciao!

this day's a b*tch... we had to do a car show outside and it rained so hard!!!! waaahhh!!! it sucks.. but it's all good.. I had fun listening to music and chilling out in the rain under my umbrella.. hehehehe.. what was the effect of the rain on us?? well.. us girls, got our jeans soaked, our heads wet and the guys had the same dilemma.. but it was all good.... the music made up for the sucky weather.. ciao!

WAAAHHH.. I'm suppose to do my assignments but instead I go online and chat and do this and take pictures and experiment.. haaayy grabe.. this is gonna have a huge cosequence to me if I don't get serious.. diba JJ??? magsalita ka!! hehehehe... anyway.. I just realized today that I get my procrastination habit from my dad.. JJ made me realize it.. hahahahaha.. (o yan ha!!! credited ka na!!! bwahahahhahaha!!!)

anyway.. what else is up?? my website's up and working.. hehehe.. some of the links are broken.. but i'll fix it soon.. if i gather enough patience again.. hmmm.. ano pa ba?? wala na e..

I just had an epiphany last night.. you know those kinds of mental future thingies that goes on when you think of a lot of things.. it's one heck of an epiphany, one that made me realize a lot of things..... di ko sabihin dito.. too personal!!!BWAHAHAHAHHAHAAHA !!!!

tapos na lab hours ko sa CHEM 151!!! wooohoooo!!! yey!!! yey!!! last lecture week na next week.. yey!!!! exams na two weeks from today!!! noooo!!!!!!!!!! hehehehe.. byebye!

song became stuck in my head..

Burn
by Usher
lyrics courtesy of letssingit.com

Girl, understand why
See, its burnin' me to hold onto this
I know this is something i gotta do
But that don't mean i want to
What I'm trying to say is that I-love-you,
I just I feel like this is coming to an end
And its better for me to let it go now
Then hold on and hurt you
I gotta let it burn

Its gonna burn for me to say this
It's comin from my heart
It's been a long time coming
But since been fell apart
I really wanna work this out
But I don't think ya gonna change ya
I do but you don't
I think it's best we go our separate ways
Tell me why I should stay in this relationship
When I'm hurting baby, I ain't happy baby
Plus theres so many other things I gotta deal with
I think that you should

(CHORUS)
Let it burn
When the feelin aint the same in your body
Don't want to, But you know you gotta let it go
Cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn let it burn (gotta let it burn)

Deep down you know it's best for ya except
But you hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that its over you know that its through
let it burn let it burn (gotta let it burn)

Sendin' pages I ain't supposed to
I Got somebody here but i want you
Cause the feelin aint the same
Find myself callin her.. your name
Ladies tell me do you understand?
Now all my fellas can you feel my pain?
It's the way I feel
I know I made a mistake
Now it's too late
I know she aint comin back
What I gotta do now
To get my shorty back (Ooo ooo ooo ooooh)
Man i dont know what im gonna do
Without my boo (ooo)
She been gone for too long
It's been 50 11 days
Ump-teen hours
Imma be burnin till ya return

(Chorus)

I'm twisted cuz one side of me
Is telling me that i need to move on
On the other side I
Wanna break down and cry ooooh
I'm twisted cuz one side of me
Is telling me that i need to move on
on the other side i
wanna break down and cry

ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh
ooooh oooh oooh
(can ya feel me burnin?)
ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh

So many days
So many hours
I'm still burnin till u return

(chorus)

Hello!! hehehe.. well.. my mom sorta reprimanded me about my rendezvous calls to the PI using my cellphon.. yes, I know it's overkill to call there for almost the whole month of may, but can you blame me?? Those were the days when I was really really alone with no one to talk to.. that's one of the reasons why I can't be left alone in the house, I get impulsive in calling... hehehehe.. men.. can't wait for my mom's reaction when she sees the Verizon bill.. hehehehehe.. haaayyy buhay.. ciao peeps! tulog na aki..

Nagkaron na ng progress yung website ko!!! Sa WAKAS!! after all these months.. grabe.. hehehe.. am so happy.. at least gawa na yung index page.. so yeah.. yun lang..

Being all alone surely sucks.. I wished my parents had another kid younger than me.. Being "only child" sucks sometimes.. Feeling ko talga, it has great effects on me.. i.e. I'm becoming even more weirder than before!!!!! HE.HE.HE. anyway .. so yeah.. I can't say much anymore.. BTW, if anybody knows a secret to moving on with your life, kindly leave me a comment... ciao!

damn... it stopped raining!! I woke up at 1pm.. yes.. yes .. i know I'm such a lazy girl, but can you blame me? I wake up at 5:45 AM every weekday mornings and saturday is the only the day that I could sleep in.. anyway back to what I'm really gonna talk about.. yes, it stopped raining! kainis!!! nawala tuloy yung inspiration ko para magaral! grrrr.. oh well..hehehehe.. I haven't really seen any rain for a while that's why I'm like this.. so forgive me for the plethora of no nonsense innuendos..

You Are Low Maintenance Otherwise known as "too good to be true" You're one laid back chica - and men love that! Just remember that no good guy likes a dormat. So if you find your self going along to get along... Stop yourself and put up a little bit of a fight. Are You High Maintenance? Take This Quiz :-) Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

I disagree with this test.. HE.He.HE. 'nuff said..

Three weeks seems to be longer that it usually is.. sometimes three weeks go by so fast for me and now it's like the clock is ticking so slowly.. I guess that's what happens when you are looking forward for something in the end.. I seriously can't wait to go back home, see my sister, see her two kids, see my friends, shop, eat the foods that I don't get to eat here, eat MANGA!!! o mi gosh.. I seriously can't wait.. pinagprapray ko na sana tuloy tuloy na 'to.. 'cause after these three months, it's gonna be a while for me to go back there..... hayyy buhay.. kung pede lang sana dun na lang ako tumira, kaya lang di pede.. dito ako napadpad and i understand that there's a reason behind it.. I can't always have what I want now can I...